Monday, February 1, 2016

IS IT FEBRUARY?

     I was reminded by Facebook that I "haven't visited Lisa Witty in a while", and it is right, on so many levels. I have been all consumed with various things, but yet, not consumed at all. And, suddenly, it's February. Suddenly, I haven't done much of anything I had planned. I had such grand ideas before the new year.


      February is the shortest month, but yet seems like one that drags along. I know that growing up in Michigan, especially, it can be a very difficult month for people up there. I know it can be difficult anywhere though. The days now have been long and dark. It's bitter cold. The holiday season has been over for a while, and the next holiday is Valentine's day, which is not fun for a lot of people. You're tired of driving in the snow. Your friends post pictures from there Caribbean vacations
that you can't afford, and what your skin wouldn't do to feel a warm, humid breeze! I know peoples' seasonal affective disorders are about in full swing. For me, February has always been one of those months where I turn inward. I kind of get my own personal, internal cabin fever.  I'm thankful I get to head out to Colorado to teach skiing, because that breaks it up a bit for me. But, I just tend to feel a little more sadness, ya know?
     I've been avoiding thinking about things- like, REALLY thinking about them. I've been in survival mode for a while, and haven't wanted to tackle certain things going on in my life. I have been learning to give myself a bit of a break, and be a little more gentle on myself...but there is one thing that I have always struggled with, and just can't forgive myself for, and really need to kick my own ass about. My music.
     I have made this beautiful album, with my better half, that we are both very proud of. We spent a lot of time on it. He dealt with my frustrations very patiently. We spent our date nights working on it. We got to come up with cool parts, and work with amazing musicians.  The whole thing was a great experience. And in my mind, things were going to happen because I finally had a new album. I LOVE creating. I LOVE recording. I LOVE putting it all together. What I DON"T love, is the marketing. I DO NOT like it Sam I Am!

     This is not because I am lazy. I have lots of great marketing ideas. I do. This feeling comes from a space of not wanting to shove my stuff on people, and fear of rejection. Is there space for me? I am not trying to come across as humble. My inner critic says, "why should you assume anyone wants to hear you!!?" Everyone has a musician friend. We all get inundated with "support my crowd funding" emails and "come to my show" Facebook posts. It seems we musicians are always needing something from others. We need to be heard!  And, so much of what I do in my life, I DO need help from others. I DO need support. But, it always feels like I am asking too much.
          I know. Get over it. It's all a part of it.  I know it's that simple. But, all the things I am supposed to do, to get my music out there- I just stop. Did you know I made a video? Well, I did, and it was fun! I never announced it. I never made it "a thing". I just put it up on YouTube and let my mom tell people. Thanks mom. But it's really starting to feel like a slap in the face to all who worked on it, and ARE proud of it, and who DO believe in me. Especially my boyfriend, who put so many hours in to editing (and THAT part? It's not fun). It deserves to be out there. It's kind of selfish not to share, right? So, I am re-telling those of you who already know my album is out there, and newly telling those who did not know it was out there, that it exists! And it's good! :) And please listen! And please, share it, and buy it! And watch my video! And support me! Please go to www.lisawitty.com where you can order CDs from me, or hop over to iTunes. It's called "Lessons In White Light". Here is a song from the album. Please enjoy it! Thank you so much for the support! Click here to download "Is It February".